Digression

Stability. That burning dot in the darkness of the night, the firefly that would forever tantalize and never come to rest any where near. A butterfly on the breeze of time that had me in hot pursuit because I’d given up trying to stand still and let it alight on my palm.

I’d look at the people that would throng the bazaars on festive days and wonder what was it that I’d missed out on? The farcical quality of their daily ministrations would give me food for thought that would ultimately be lost undigested in the realm of the subconscious because more mundane matters would over take the conscious mind.

I’d wait at bus stops forever waiting for that bus that would take me home. Buses would come packed with people but the people I was waiting for would never be on them. I’d take the bus back eking out an existence that was as boring as it was uninspiring.

In the midst of all this I’d met Loyana a few times. She’d appear out of the blue and after bringing a crashing wave of freshness into my life she’d leave just as suddenly. It was the same every time and yet it was refreshing. We never crossed the line that separated love and friendship. She wanted to I didn’t. I knew It’d take me to a place where I wouldn’t be able to return from.

I’d made that mistake already and in the end it hadn’t been pretty. Suffice it to say that I’d never do it again. But there again I went wrong and gave Loyana another reason to push me on the path to hell.